This weekend, I went to Winter Park with some friends. Though we got a decent amount of physical activity, there is no way it could have burned off the crazy amount of junk food we ate. I like to think that I have a way healthier lifestyle now and don't even desire lots of junk food anymore, but this weekend proved otherwise. Maybe it was just because it was right there in front of me. I did eat some fruit, though. My water intake wasn't incredible, but I tried to drink water when I could.

However, since yesterday, I've been sick. High fever, dizziness, headache, sore throat, nausea, the works. Yesterday I only ate around 900 calories because the thought of food just made me feel nauseas and it hurts to swallow. The symptoms didn't start kicking in until after school, so I had my breakfast, lunch, snack etc. Today, I've forced myself to eat a 100 calorie Chewy bar. I'm just not hungry.

I weighed in this morning though and experienced a tiny loss, dispite this weekend. Probably because I ate so little yesterday. 126.2 lbs. Yay! I mean, it's probably not a good thing that I'm starving myself but it's not like I'm doing it on purpose. I just can't eat. I just hope my metabolism doesn't get too screwed up haha. But I'm ready to get better--I feel awful.

So last night, I sort of went over my calorie limit but it's okay, because I went to the gym and had a good workout plus my metabolism spiked for certain reasons I will not disclose. I maintained the day before. I've had a lot of sugar and cookies in the past few days, and I hope it doesn't hinder my weight loss.

I was planning on weighing in today. Didn't happen because I stayed over at a friend's house. But tomorrow, I will. Not hoping for a significant loss considering the past few days, but maybe a little something. A .2 lb loss, maybe. Please God not a gain. I've been basically inhaling water the past few days, it's ridiculous.

Today I went to the gym. Spent about 13 min on the elliptical (150 calories) and did about 4-5 sets of 30 bicycle crunches and some stretching. Not a long workout. I haven't been having very long workouts lately. Just enough to get some burn in and get my metabolism going. It felt like a good workout, though.

I'm slightly over my calorie limit becauseI had an extreme calorie-and-sodium packed breakfast (An asiago bagel with cream cheese and a blueberry muffin at Panera) For dinner, I had a salad and vegetarian chili. Since then, I've had 2 slices of peanut butter toast, 3 slices of cantalope, and 2 apples. Just trying to boost my cal intake. The fruit didn't do much considering how low cal they are, but I'm alright. I feel like I've satisfied my day's calories, maybe a little more. I'm not too worried though. I'm drinking lots of water.

I weighed in at 127 lbs yesterday, and today I was like what the heck, I'll weigh in again today. I don't know what inspired me to do so. The entire walk to the bathroom, I was repeatedly telling myself that any gain is simply water weight and nothing to worry about, because I ate a whole spoonful of peanut butter and had a bunch of valentines day candy yesterday. But to my surprise, the scale said 125.8 lbs! WOAH! I ate that thing of peanut butter and wasn't able to drink my regular amount of water and I still had a loss! And a good one, at that. This is awesome.

Today, I'm going to hot yoga with my mom. I went last week and I loved it. We went to the supposedly unheated one, but it got pretty hot in there. It's hard! It's great strength training though, so I'm prepping for a good workout today. Obviously, it won't be wild, burn-wise, but still a good workout nonetheless.

I'm so glad about this newfound inspiration to keep going strong and reach my goal. I can't become lax now. I remember just over 6 months and 12 lbs ago, when I decided to lose this weight once and for all (before Calorie Count), my "workouts" were walking/running up and down the stairs as many times as I could in 20 minutes. I was dripping with sweat and totally draining my water! Now, I'm doing hot yoga and going to the gym a few times a week, feeling strong and powerful instead of sweating and exhausted. I drink the water not because I'm hot and exhausted, but because I know I need to. It's a great feeling, and I hope I keep it up and get to 118 lbs!

I have realized that I've fallen off the wagon quite a bit. I don't feel as healthy and strong as I once did. I'm relaxing a bit more, and not working out as much. I keep denying it, but it's true.

I weighed in this morning at 127 lbs. Small gain. But starting today, I'm getting back to the grindstone, for real this time. I may not be able to get to the gym every evening like I used to, but I'm still going when I can and counting my calories and drinking lots of water. I'm gonna need to burn just under a lb a week to reach my mini-goal of 122 lbs by the time I go to Montana for college visits. That's crazy fast, because I only have about 6 weeks left. But I'm focused, I have to be.

For extra motivation, here's a post from October 14th, 2009. Just to put things in perspective.

So, around 7 lbs to my goal, (Note: my goal has changed since then) I'm contemplating why I don't look like I've lost any weight. 10 lbs down, I'm not expecting to look substantially smaller, but geez, I was hoping to at least get rid of the random roll beneath my shoulder blades and my tummy get a bit tighter. I feel like maybe I look a little healthier, and I feel a LOT healthier, but I'm not anywhere near where I want to be. So, I either need to do three things: 1). Cut down on the cardio, and do more toning, 2). Change my goal to 115 lbs by December 19th (cruise to the Caribbean! =D), or 3). Wait until I get to 120 lbs and see how I look. But, 7 lbs away, I'm still hardly seeing any abs. I have to stand up straight and stretch out really tall to see an outline. Which is another thing -- I really need to work on my posture! I slouch wayyy too much.

I've gotten out of my slump, but only halfway. I'm going to make a list now of reasons WHY I'm trying to lose this weight, so I can reflect on it the next time I'm having a bad day.

1. I have a heavier family, and I want to break the cycle and prove that I am above genetics.
2. I want to prove to myself that I am capable of working hard and actually doing something about what I've complained about for so long.
3. I wanna wear a bikini!
4. When I get older and have kids, I'll probably put on some weight. If I'm overweight now, then I don't even want to imagine how heavy I'll be then!
5. I'd like to get in good shape and develop good habits now, so when I'm old I can have a long life and not have to worry about my blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes, my heart, or any other potential health problems I may have as an old lady.
6. I want to be able to go to the mall and buy clothes because I think they're cute, not necessarily because they flatter my shape.
7. I want to be able to talk to guys without having to worry if my tummy is hanging out or I look like I'm out of shape.
8. I want to be able to improve my times in swimming by getting slimmer (increasing aquadynamics) and getting stronger.
9. I want to learn to bellydance, and not feel self conscious doing so.
10. I don't want to be the biggest girl in the room anymore.
11. I don't want to be the "chubby" friend anymore.
12. I've always wanted to look like the girls in the music videos. Not the girl that's barely wearing anything and is shaking her rump all over the place, but the girl that the guy falls in love with. I want to be that kind of unconventional pretty.
13. I want to be able to go to the grocery store or the ice cream place and get some ice cream or other unhealthy indulgence and not worry if people see me, overweight, and look into my cart at the indulgence and judge me as the "fat girl who eats ice cream."
14. I want to feel better about eating in front of people.
15. I've always wanted to go skinny dipping.
16. I want to show the world the real me--the sexy, fabulous me! Not the chubby, insecure "me."
17. I want to look good in pictures, and not have to worry about what poses look more flattering.
18. When I go to big girl school, i.e. college, I want to be able to focus on my studies and making friends and meeting boys and not feel insecure because I'm not exactly pretty enough, whatever that may be.
19. I want some self esteem!
20. I want to prove to the mean girls who have put me down all my life that I AM BEAUTIFUL, and I don't want to give them any reason to put me down any longer.
21. I want to look hot for prom.

This list will expand, I'm sure, but this is all I could think of at the moment.

I weighed in at 126.8 lbs this morning. No loss, but no gain. I'm really not surprised, being that I haven't had too much physical activity since my last weigh in (I haven't had none, but it has gradually been decreasing). No matter. Starting today I'm going to the gym 5 days a week again for at least 45 minutes. Back to my pre-swimming schedule. Do some cardio on the elliptical, and some strength training to try to keep at least some of those swimming muscles in top shape in the off season. I'm feeling really good about what's to come. I CAN get back down to 122 lbs (or less) by Spring Break! If I've lost that 5 lbs once before, I CAN do it again! My success was not by pure luck, it was done by hard work and smart choices.

The next time I'll weigh in will be Wednesday. I'm not setting a goal for myself except for a bit of a loss, maybe around 126.2 lbs, more or less. I need to get cracking, considering last week I only lost about .4 lbs. These last 10 lbs are AWFUL.

Goals for this week:
- Drink at least three 20 mL water bottles a day.
- Exercise every day except for Monday and Friday, getting 1/2 hour of cardio and at least 15 minutes of strength training.
- Keep my daily sodium intake as far under 2000g as possible.
- Maintain a balanced diet, and eat more vegetables.

Measurements (in inches) as of 1/31/10:
Bust: 39 --> 38 --> 38 (goal: 35)
Waist: 31 --> 31 --> 29 --> 30.1 (goal: 27)
Hips: 37 --> 35.3 --> 34.2 --> 35 (goal: 35)
Thigh: 22 --> 21.5 --> 21.5 --> 22 (goal: 20)

Yesterday, I weighed in at 126.8. Woot! I'm getting back down! I'm going to weigh in again on Sunday and hope for something lower than that, maybe a 126.2?

Today, as of 3:38 PM, I've eaten around 875 calories. Among those happens to be a chocolate doughnut I ate in Gov. Kinda regret it, but not too much because I'm still in the calorie limit and I'm eating pretty healthy. I'm at a B+ today. Not in my usual A range, but a B+ is still good considering that doughnut. I've drunk around 2.5 8mL glasses of water today (= 1 water bottle) and plan on drinking at least two more water bottles.

Tomorrow is B league for swimming. After that, the season is over. This morning was the last practice. Tonight I'm getting a good night's sleep, because tomorrow I have to be up early and on my game for my races. It'll be a fairly inactive day besides that, due to the fact that the meet lasts all day long. Will still try to stay active, though.

Weighed in Monday at 127.2 lbs. Hell yes. Hopefully, I'll keep it off, and take more off than I did before. I'm weighing in again tomorrow. I don't have a goal, just aiming for lower than 127.2 if possible.

I went to Target. Tried on a pair of 5 jeans. Too small. :( But it was close. I got them almost all the way up. So that's good. I hope to fit into them eventually...

Swimming is almost over. It's the last week, which means I'm going to have to go to the gym more next week. I'm pretty happy, honestly. Swimming was nice exercise but I was really tired all the time from waking up early. Plus it never really gave me that good cardio after a while. So I'm ready to get back to my gym routine and am hoping for results.